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Same sex dating is often more frustrating, unstable, discouraged, complex and bears more risk than heterosexual dating - but we still do it as those are the cards life dealt to us! Nope, you have to find the gays; and let me just say, they are quite the elusive prey. I mean, don't get me wrong, my crush is as gay as a weird polygamous baby between Tim Gunn, Tyler Oakley, and Elton John - but he has a boyfriend. And I'm one of them. I have to be honest, I really haven't found it to be the case that gay or bi dating is any more or less difficult than other forms of dating.

I'm a very ordinary looking guy. Nothing distinctive except maybe nice dark blue eyes. But dating hasn't been too bad. I've had lots of dates with mostly great guys, fallen deeply and mutually in love several times. Finally married my stunningly handsome husband seventeen years ago.

2. We Narrow Down Our Search for a Date Prospect to Nothingness

I've got mostly a happy life with lots of friends and a close family. A couple key differences in my life though, as opposed to some of the other answers. I have kept far, far, FAR, away from the traditional gay social circles. No bars. No clubs. I am very happy to remain single. I have a wonderful career, great friends and an amazing family that keep me pretty busy. Should an awesome guy enter the equation — great.

But a partner is neither going to define who I am or make or break my future. If someone reaches out to speak to me, I ask them what they are looking for because I am amenable. I am happy to have fun, meet new friends or go on dates in the hopes that it turns into a relationship. If not, then why go on a date in the first place? There are an endless amounts of ways for gay men to get their dick sucked in large metropolitan areas: This seems a pretty fair assessment to me.

You may end up being pleasantly surprised by what you find. This excuse for not meeting again is the oldest and lamest of them all.

1. Our Dating Pool is Sparse to Begin With

We are all busy at work, and honestly, I would expect nothing less from the person I am dating. I love a man with drive.

10 Reasons Why Gay Dating Is Really Hard

Again, I am calling bullshit on this excuse. We all have jobs and lives: If you are not in a position to date someone right now, you should not be going on dates. Unless you plan to date a newborn baby, we all have baggage. We all have pasts and sometimes the things that have happened to us in the past can be very traumatic. I have found that most strong-willed people can take that baggage and turn it into a positive, therefore making themselves a better person in the process.

We all have exes.

We all have problems with our jobs or strive for something better. Like I said, we are all in different places and some of our baggage is heavier than others. But asking questions and being honest usually does the trick. It is not, however an acceptable excuse to not see someone again. Because if you are going on an initial date: Does being "masc" make him better in bed or a more loving potential boyfriend?

Of course not. And in my experience, he'll probably end up doing a Miss Vanjie impression after his third drink, anyway. Look, no one can tell you what should or shouldn't turn you on. We all have different tastes and that's what makes sex and dating so exciting. But some of my most epic hook-ups have been with guys who don't resemble the "type" I think I'm into. There was an older doctor whose bedroom had a mirrored ceiling and Sure, youth can be intoxicating, but so is a guy who's been to a few rodeos and knows how to handle a bucking bronco.

Whether you're young, old, or somewhere in between, it's always sexier when you own it. Packages at the UPS depot are "sorted. We're constantly-evolving works in progress who fuck up, fall down, and pick ourselves up again.

Guys who call themselves "sorted" probably mean they're financially stable and ready to settle down. Which is great, so just say it that way. Here's the thing: There are plenty of decent apps out there, and even more that are up-and-coming.

The best queer dating apps, since meeting people in real life is hell

For people who are queer and want to connect, fear not. There's no need to go to the cheesy bar down the block. Bust out your phone and let your index finger do the hard work. We're using cookies to improve your experience. Click Here to find out more. Like Follow Follow. Whether you hate it a little or hate it a lot, it's a rite of passage for most of us. Best for queer women.

The Good. Free version: Yes Paid version: And queer women basically have one: Thankfully, HER is a non-offensive, user friendly app good for folks seeking long-term relationships as well as those who want a more, uh, temporary arrangement. Aside from a dating app, HER also acts as a sort of Facebook group for the queer community: Go to local events, find new LGBT movies to watch, bash the government, and connect with anyone who shares a post you like.

The site doesn't assume that all of their users are cis women and allows folks to identify as genderfluid, non-binary, and otherwise. Details to remember: HER is totally free to download. Accounts are verified and linked to people's Facebook profiles, so you're less likely to find fake profiles and trolls. Users have to be incredibly selective about their words and corny jokes. It can sometimes take several message before you realize the person you're speaking with is way too into Harry Potter. Check it out here.